1955 Good Housewife’s Guide

I have seen this before and I couldn’t believe what I was reading. So when I saw it again, I had to post it. What is scary about this, is that there are some wife’s and husband’s who still believe in these rules…

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Rule 1 –  Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time, for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him, and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home, and the prospect of a good meal (especially his favourite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed.

Rule 2 –  Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you’ll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair, and be fresh-looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary people.

Rule 3 — Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip though the main part of the house just before your husband arrives.

Rule 4 — Gather up schoolbooks, toys, paper etc. and then run a dust cloth over the tables.

Rule 5 — Over the cooler months of the year, you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift, too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.

Rule 6 — Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children’s hands and faces (if they are small), comb their hair and, if necessary, change their clothes. They are little treasures, and he would like to see them playing the part. Minimize all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer, and vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet.

Rule 7 — Be happy to see him.

Rule 8 — Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.

Rule 9 — Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first- remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.

Rule 10 — Make the evening his. Never complain if he comes home late, or goes out to dinner, or other places of entertainment without you. Instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure and his very real need to be at home and relax.

Rule 11 — Your goal: Try to make your home is a place of peace, order, and tranquility where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.

Rule 12 — Don’t complain if he comes home late to dinner, or even if he stays out all night. Compare this as minor compared to what he may have gone through that day.

Rule 13 — Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.

Rule 14 — Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.

Rule 15 — Don’t ask him questions about his actions or question his judgment or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house, and as such, will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him.

Rule 16 — A good wife always knows her place.

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45 Responses

  1. Yes, some people do believe in such rules and they SHOULD NOT be “shunned” by people like you who don’t agree with them. Obviously they might not agree with YOUR way of living but it’s no ones fucking business what anyone else does with their life. Someone’s pride and joy might be someone else’ nightmare. No one should be looked down upon for what they CHOOSE to do in life. The keyword here is CHOOSE!!

  2. Aubrie: when anyone decides that it’s okay to subjugate another by putting them in a one-down position, it lessens all of us. No woman should ever live what’s presented in this article. Men are not better than women, men are not the end-all be-all of a woman’s existence. And I DO look down on any woman who willingly lives a demeaned life and on any man who thinks that it’s his right to put a woman in that position.

    • Well k41150 thats your opinion. And that is all it is is your opinion and is no better and not any righter than anyone elses.

    • What is so demeaning about taking care of your husband? I personally believe that women who CHOOSE to stay home to raise their families and take care of their husbands have made great life choices.

      the funny thing about taking care of your husband the way these rules suggest, is that they work, I feed my family when my husband gets home from work, his stomach is full and he is relaxed. by that time of the day the kids need to wind down so quiet time is important. I am relaxed when he walks in the door because he doesn’t need to hear me whine and complain about potty training and the neighbors, he just spent ten hours dealing with grouchy work people. I clean my house and make it a peaceful haven because it is my home and who wants to live in chaos. I make my husband comfortable in our bed so that when I crawl into bed beside him he knows that I love him.

      You sound young, you have no right to look down on any one… perhaps next time your looking down on women like me you may want to acknowledge the fact that there is nothing demeaning about being good at being a wife. If more women took the role as WIFE instead of WOMAN perhaps divorce rates wouldn’t be so high.

      My husband is not the end all and be all of my existence, nor am I his, he did not ask me to take the role of 50′s house wife, I assumed it on my own. No man can make a woman do something she doesn’t want to. When you wrote the words you wrote you spit on every woman who has made the selfless choice to put herself last and her marriage and family first

      • I read your comments and I thought good for you for expressing your OPINION. I posted the article, but I did not write it. I wrote that there are still people out there that believe everything in that article. Times have changed, people have changed. You asked me not to judge, but isn’t that what you did to me? We all have our own and different opinions and we should not be judged for voicing them.

      • I completely agree with you! I wish I would have been able to do the same thing.

  3. @k41150
    As a male, I find it is my duty to address your ignorance. I have had to endure the social experiments that the federal government mandated on the US military for the last 20 years. What used to take a single man to lift now has labels on them requiring a 4 person lift. To violate this is to risk reprimand. A team consists of 4 persons and I create the teams based on rank and status. It so happened i had a team of all women. They could not come close to meeting the time standard for setting up a telecom site so I had to rate them as failing. I was then ordered to balance out the teams and ensure that there was an equal handicap to all teams. This has proven to me time and time again that no matter how much women claim to be equal, it will not make it so. I never claimed that I could out sew or out iron a woman. I am amazed at the way a woman manages a household. they are truly domestic goddesses. I do not go out of my way to prove that I can do everything a woman can do, but you on the other hand seems it is your mission to prove you are equal to a man. Know this: No matter how hard you try, you will never come close to being a man although you may look like one, you will never be one. The whole idea is that the the differences in the sexes are what ensures the survival of the species. As more women opt out of partnering with men and men opting out in favor of other men, we are doomed. It is the synergy of the man-woman partnership that is our only hope. Today’s women leave the raising of their children to strangers so they can go out and compete with men for what they feel is being denied them. As a result, what used to only require a single income now requires two because the wage pool has been diluted thanks to all the Feminazis.

    No matter how many times or how loud you shout, you will never be equal nor should either sex contend to be.

    Now get back to the kitchen and make me a sandwich!

    • I am a 32 year old wife of 12 years and mother of 3 beautiful daughters. Several years ago I read this book and was fascinated in the pride women used to take in keeping their house a home. Why can’t we embrace this art and see the beauty that it is? I was raised by a family of feminist women who wanted so much to be equal that many of them decided not to shave their armpit hair anymore. I never understood the contradiction they were pushing – “be proud to be a woman”…but act and look like a man whenever possible??? If you’re so proud of being a women, then shave your legs and armpits, put that pretty bow in your hair and embrace all that it is to be a woman.

      Now, as I said I am the mother of three and I was lucky enough to be a stay at home mother for the last 5 years, but the economy is impossible now and I have no choice but to leave my children in order to put food in their mouths. I can’t keep my home the way I used to, it is a mess. I am ashamed of how we live now and I am worried about my children because when they come home they aren’t being embraced by the warmth I’ve spent the day creating, instead they are being rushed through the evening as I try to complete all of the same duties that I used to have all day to complete. I don’t understand how some women can call this “equal.” Our families are suffering for feminists and their silly pride (IMO far worst than a man’s pride anyday) and this IS what is going wrong with our country! Women were created to be mothers that is our GIFT – not our burden!

      • Of the posts that I have put on my blog, this one seems to effect people. I only hope that the economy improves so mothers can be mothers.

      • Thank you! I FULLY agree. Men and women are different; that is like having two different poles in a relationship. And there need to be a polarity in the relationship, like earth has two poles to keep earth together. If there is no polarity, there is no magnet – and we drift away. First women try to be equal to men, then women complaine why men are not men anymore, and then – in the end women start looking for “real” men somewhere else. That is already happening in Northern Europe where we have had this “equality” much longer than in the USA. Our women are having holidays in countries, where they feel like a women. And men are having similar holidays in countries where women are still women, and where our men can feel like “men”. So it goes around.

        I am very highly educated, MD, PhD, have been totally, really independent for over 30 years, taken full responsibility of everything. I looked for a stronger man, but could not find anyone before I learned to be a woman. And today I LOVE to be a woman to my MAN, to My Darling King, who is the boss in the family. And I am The Woman, just LOVE it! Our passion and love are unbeatable!

      • You said you read a book about women and there pride in there house. Do you remember the name. I have two daughters and are trying to raise them right.

      • Thanks for reading my post. Not sure about the book. Did I post something about it or did someone else? The post is an article that I just copied and posted on my blog.

      • I too am one very happy housewife I have been doing it for a shorter amount of time but I love every minute of it. I am fortunate to have such an amazing man who works his butt off to provide for our family. I would love to know the title of the book you read.

      • You know I have a lot if comments, good and bad, in this post. I got it from someone else and just posted it. Some of it I totally agree with and some I disagree with. Sorry, I don’t have the title of the book.

      • Thanks, as a man i love what you have said. Women are gorgeous, they work hard and are vital to our country. Whats wrong with keeping the kids and home on track? My dad always respected my mum for having and bringing up three kids in the 60′s and 70′s. Men and women…mum and dad together. xxx

    • I am also a male. Please refrain from blaming all the problems you identify in the world on any particular group of people. It just makes everyone look stupid.

      • ** the above post is aimed at “TheFinalWord”.

      • @Johndoe. And your point is? What specifically do you want me to censor from my comments? Again, my main points are that men and women are different for a reason. The growing trend is to isolate and ridicule as being “old fashioned”, any women that embrace the idea that they are partners with their husband and choose to raise their children and support the idea of their husband being the primary bread winner. I also illustrate primary source examples of how extremist and politically correct this movement has infected every aspect of our society. I have a right to disagree and find that your insistence that somehow should sugar coat my view laughable. Think of it this way: I am the one that will acknowledge the white elephant of politically correct extremism in the room that everyone else turns a blind eye to.

        Here is a good exercise for you: Form a logical argument for your position and rebut mine otherwise your comments add nothing to the debate.

    • Love that. Thank you. I will send also to you my earlier reply. Hope you will get this.

      Thank you! I FULLY agree. Men and women are different; that is like having two different poles in a relationship. And there need to be a polarity in the relationship, like earth has two poles to keep earth together. If there is no polarity, there is no magnet – and we drift away. First women try to be equal to men, then women complaine why men are not men anymore, and then – in the end women start looking for “real” men somewhere else. That is already happening in Northern Europe where we have had this “equality” much longer than in the USA. Our women are having holidays in countries, where they feel like a women. And men are having similar holidays in countries where women are still women, and where our men can feel like “men”. So it goes around.

      I am very highly educated, MD, PhD, have been totally, really independent for over 30 years, taken full responsibility of everything. I looked for a stronger man, but could not find anyone before I learned to be a woman. And today I LOVE to be a woman to my MAN, to My Darling King, who is the boss in the family. And I am The Woman, just LOVE it! Our passion and love are unbeatable!

  4. Whether a person is satisfied in what he or she is doing depends on the quantum of happiness and pride they are getting from what they are indulged in.I’m a happy house wife because I’m enjoying my duties,responsibilities and privileges as a homemaker.I dont think that the rules given in Good Housewife’s Guide is something which could not be imagined or practiced nowadays.A dedicated wife can obviously make her home a Heaven and make the life of each person in her family worthliving.Giving enough concern and due respect to one’s own husband and undertaking the household jobs including the care of kids can never be considered as something which diminishes the value of womenhood.These all things can perfectly be done only by a GOOD HOUSEWIFE.

  5. If a female wants to stay home and bring up the perfect children with the perfect home ready for her perfect husband… that is her choice and that’s fine. I myself do not find it realistic and think these rules are demeaning to women by stating they are “rules”. However, there are lots of women I see as perfect moms and wives not because of their ideal looking clean-and-tidy house. They play with the kids or take time out to relax with the husband. I am a full time working wife. My spouse (who is a male) and I help to keep the house clean, supper ready, “children in order”. Not just me… it is a partnership. As long as in marriage there is an equal partnership where both people are needed by the other… that’s what counts! I am proud to be a female and take care of myself because I like myself and do not need a man’s approvel. I don’t need a set of rules to tell me how to take pride in “wifely skills”.
    I always think, if all us women are good for is to cook and clean… the men got the butt end of the deal. Most men, I’m sure would not say they married their wife because she could cook and clean and follow “the good housewife’s guide”. Yet I could be wrong.. maybe that’s all some men think about.

  6. … i am 25 and i have been married 5 years, my house is my calling card and my husband is the man i love… i take care of the house and our son and i enjoy doing so.
    These rules are not hard to follow they are habit for me and will always be.
    No shame in taking pride in your family or home.

    I have no fight here with anyone who has a different point of view than me after all “to each their own”.
    Thank you for posting the article.

  7. Im pretty sure this is an Urban Legend.

  8. I actually love this article. It sums up what I would like to be as a wife and mother. I want to be someone who is strong enough to put the needs of others above my own needs. I think it takes more strength and power to consistently value others more than yourself. It is easy to rant and rave about your own rights and to always want to put yourself first, but the ideas in this article are about putting others first. I take great joy in caring for my husband and it is part of what makes our marriage so strong. I take care of his needs and he takes care of mine. When you are focused on someone else, they often end up focused on you. I think if more people genuinely committed themselves loving and serving their spouses, many more marriages would last and many more people would be happy.

  9. The nuclear family has been under attack by feminists for quite a while.

    As soon as women stop trying to be men, the divorce rate will drop.

    There is nothing wrong with a lady running the house in this manner.

    My wife follows most of the above guidelines. I am happy and so is she.

    Yes there is a chain of command but then there is a lot of trust and good communication. She submits…I delegate a LOT to her.

    Stop trying to be men…you will fail and you will not find happiness in this role you can never achieve.

  10. I submit to my husband who accepts me as a woman(with all the flaws that come with being a woman).

    I care for his needs and the needs of our children as is right.

    These rules are good for women as they help define for us what matters and this allows us to try to stay focused on what is important….our families.

    As for the outside world, you can keep it. It is a hole that I want no part of. I submit to and support my husband and I take pride in the fact that his success is due to my support of him and our family.

    I know this is why our family is so successful and happy and I hope you find it too.

    • This post has generated a lot of comments. Nice to know that we live in a time where we can express ourself. Thanks for reading my blog.

  11. @aubrie — I agree wholeheartedly. Take me, for example. I’m a murderer and child-molester. No one should look down upon me for the way I choose to live my life — it’s my choice! Thank you, Aubrie, for your understanding.

    • Stevesp101, you seem to of missed what Aubrie was talking about. To be a “murderer and child-molester” you have removed the choice of others from what they would choose to be/do. The second you choose to live a life out side of the laws, you choose to be judged by a jury of your piers.

  12. I am a working wife and mother however I would love to be a stay at home mom but we can not afford it. On days I make it home before my husband I love to try and clean up the house and make him dinner and have it ready as soon as he gets home. And ladies if you do not think your man would like this you are wrong! My husband is more romantic when I do this for him and you want to know why …. because he does not have to worry about doing anything but loving me! He is a great man and I wish I could do more for him! I am not saying you need to follow the rules but at least try! Just sum the rules up a little … take care of your children … clean your house…. love your husband ….. and that shouldnt be hard to do and if you want to have HATE for EVERYONE who is OK with this article than you are either not a CHRISTIAN or not a GOOD CHRISTIAN if you read the BIBLE then turn the page to PROVERBS 31: 10-31

  13. I wish to thank the 1950′s housewife for it was she who raised me to be the independant woman I am today. My mother showed me unconditional support, conflict resolution and a total dedication to the important things in life. Family. As for my existance, well I am divorced raising two boys through my husbands choices. I am however very good with time management, am able to sort out the household ahead of time and while there is not alot of time for me, that is my choice to raise my children. I have to work, but my mothers influence is always there. Even though sometimes it all just falls apart.

  14. First I want to say it is an individual decision as to the home environment and relationship dynamic any individual chooses for their life as long as they aren’t hurting anyone. With that said my personal opinion is the article is worded badly and even though men and women are not equal in physical strength everyone is equal as human beings. I don’t even mind the word “rules” being used because in truth all relationships have unspoken rules. Had I written this acrticle it would read
    The 2011 Guide to a Good Marriage
    1. Plan ahead decide the night before who will me making dinner and who will be doing the cleanup. If your spouse has had a particularly rough day show them you care by offering to do both.
    2. Both spouses should clean themselves and children up before dinner, change out of work/school clothes so all can look and feel more refreshed.
    3. Everyone in the home should be responsible for putting up what they have taken out and each spouse helping with clutter left by small children.
    4. The last spouse to leave the home in the morning does a quick run through to make sure all breakfast dishes or any clutter is picked up and everything is turned of, the first to return home should do a run through and wipe off any dust, and help children with homework.
    5. Have children pick up all school supplies and any mess they have made (unless to small to do so)
    6. Be happy to see each other.
    7. Say grace, and have a wonderful meal at the dinner table giving each member of the family a chance to tell about the day they have had. Keep in mind no ones day was any more important than anyone elses, so the first one to speak up has the floor.
    8. Never undermine the importance of a daily event had by your spouse or your children.
    9. Always nurture each others self esteem.
    10. Have family time be it a ball game, board game, some tv on the couch, or reading together.
    11. Have everyone help pick up and get there stuff together for the next day.
    12. If your spouse has had a rough day make him/her a drink fluff a pillow for them, alert the children to try and keep the noise to a minimum.
    13. Never drive each other crazy with talking about work so much, let your home be a place of peace where you don’t have to think of work.
    14. If either spouse will be home more than 30 minutes late call the other, it is very rude to make someone worry.
    15. If one spouse stays out doing who knows what till very late Without so much as a phone call remind them next time to call, everyone needs a break and some free time, inform them you will be taking yours the next day.
    16. Love, honor, and respect each other. Help each other to achieve the goals of the family both inside and outside the home.
    17. Never take your spouse or any good deed they do for granted.
    18. Anytime one spouse is home alone be it because the other is grocery shopping or it is a day off that’s a great time for laundry, major cleaning, and yard work.
    **anyone who believes men are better or more important than women, is a sexist and probably also a racist** also for any man who thinks all women should be home fixing their hair, baking cookies, and having babies I know a great deal of women surgeons, doctors, police officers, emt, and firefighters…at some point you may find yourself very humbled by having to thank them for saving your life or the life of someone you love. Even though lots of men still think a womans place is in the home keep in mind when you need the help of one you will be glad she’s there.

  15. There’s great pride to be had in being able to stay home with your pre-school children (a financial privelege) and keeping a lovely home. But yes, it’s a decision that is made by both spouses. Trouble with this particular piece – and any of those old-time books and articles – are the statements that demean the wives as subservient and second-class. Seems to me Ms. Blogger made those already evident sentences even more easily found by putting them in bold; she’s aware of the socially harmful points here. Remove those, though, and how very different is this from any other homekeeping, Martha Stewart-esque book or magazine article? To everyone who’s being ugly here in the comments, realize that this, like all else is life, is not a black-and-white issue; there’s almost always a happy mediium.

  16. U know I really wouldn’t mind doing some of these things for what would be my husband if he is a true loving, honest, trust whorty man. Hell I’d even work and pay bills.

  17. Sadly, these principles have been all but abandoned in post-feminist society.

  18. Wow this one brought you a ton of comments Sylvia!
    I think the problem is that the main POINT of this article is diluted by the way the article is presented. The quasi-humorous tone goes down the wrong way and infuriates more people, and many women have a hard time accepting it. Sentences like ” After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction” are unnecessary and only add fuel to the fire. If the article is suggesting the opinion that part of a woman’s duty is to take care of her husband and home, then I don’t think that’s a particularly wrong sentiment.

    I know I hope that when I am married, I will look forward to taking care of my husband, cooking his favorite food, and making sure we are comfortable together. If he is worthy of that treatment and I love him, I have no qualms doing what the article suggests I do. (Maybe not the parts where I worship his needs and put them above mine, but the basics of a good meal, a clean house, and some serenity sound great to me)

    Where I disagree with this article is in its tone. It presents them in such a way that you can’t help but disagree with it immediately. Then you re-read and ignore the pretentious bullshit sentences infused into the article and you see the basic suggestions, and they aren’t as offensive as the article as a whole is.

    I’m itching to present a counter-guide for the husbands haha. And updating this one to the current decade.

    • Oh damn also, you wrote this 3 years ago. It was linked to in the recent posts section of your blog and I didn’t check the date before commenting!

      • You know I have had so many comments on this post. I had to remind some that I did not write it! Funny how different people can read something and get different meanings and tones from it. I’m just amazed that something “I” posted had this effect. Who know?? LOL

      • Oh I know! (You didn’t write this, I know that too lol) It’s controversial anytime equality gets involved…with any subject. Too many people bluster self-righteously as if it’ll further their cause when it won’t though. If you don’t like what somebody thinks, make sure you don’t marry em ><

  19. You’d be surprised by how much personal satisfaction you do get if you openly follow these rules. Not every day, make him do the dishes on a Saturday occasionally or mop the floors while you run the kids around, that way he will be even more grateful :) a nice man will live and appreciate you for your actions, if he expects it however, dump his ass!

  20. I’m completely in support of these rules as a matter of fact my husband doesn’t allow me to leave our home without his permission. My husband set the rules for me to be his Good Wife and I’m GRATEFUL

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